Confusion

Well.... when you tell a man(A). I want out because you are squishing my soul...... (read that as:I have found a man(B) who likes all the parts of me that you say that you don't want me to have and that I should try to resist these things cause they are unbecoming behaviors for your property to have..... )

then sometimes you get a kick in the ass cause that same man(A) may stand up and say what is it that you need, I love you and you shall have it..... Be prepared for that.... I wasn't.... Now I haven't slept... Eaten... I feel sick... and I have no clue what to do from  here.... What... Why are you mocking me out there....

Two men who care for me...
A. been together a while. saying all the right things. doing all the right things. offering all the right things.
B. just offering himself to me hmm

I don't know... must think... sleep too.

Friday Friday Friday

Well Thursday night was a freakin riot. Hung out with a friend of mine from PA. The man is a marvelous genuine gentleman of a caliber you just don't see today. Thomas you are just what the doctor ordered. Sometime it is better to spend an entire evening being charmingly flirted up by a man who you know isn't trying to get into your pants. Refreshing is a real and true way.

Staying for the sex

OK I heard a disturbing Strawberry letter this morning on the Steve Harvey Morning Show. It was great. Girl stuck with dude cause the sex is GREAT. OK I been there. I married mines. But I damn sure knew I shouldn't when I did it. Come on people. If good sex made a good relationship then there are people in everyone's past they would never have left/let go. Sex is physical and that isn't everything. I felt bad for the woman but hey you have to grow up some time.

And here's the first candidate

What do you call him. that guy that comes right after a breakup..... the Rebound man is in town people. And he has his A game on.
And I plan on falling for it with grace and wallowing in the attention.

Some day soon I will realize that it is super temporarly but at the moment I am enjoying Mr. Right Now.

He is fabulous. To the salon for a Mani-Pedi, Then lets jump on this man while he is hot.

Bullshit and some more

This ass <read my wonderful husband> just emailed my family screenshots of my fetpage <a fetish oriented community page similar to facebook>. Hmm I may need bail money. I would also like to point out that its not that my family isn't evolved in my life a lot of them know some of what I do but it isn't anyone's place to inform your family about your private life. After letting that ass back in my life after he trashed all my online accounts, email addresses, and community pages last year, I should have known that it wasn't worth the second chance.

Floundering like a fishy

Life sucks so bad at the moment I am actually considering taking to a life of crime. Living by the rules hasn't gotten me shit. I am 30. yes fucking 30, speeding toward a divorce, childless cause my only kids were his from another relationship. So I am old and by the time, read IF, I find someone I will be to old to procreate. My biological clock did some math and just closed up the show. To top it all off I got notice on friday that the job I hate is ending in four weeks YA. Glad I never had time for a vacation now. I will get that paid out in cash now at least. The words "Ready for a Change" have never felt so appropriate.

So I'm Listening.