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Wednesday, June 8


I am at the point now where I need more attention. I am not ignored... We just work different schedule so my free time is his sleep time and vice versa. So I get home from work and C's only been to bed like 2 hours ago so I can't be a bitch and wake him just for kicks cause that would make his balls early day suck and not in the good down on your knees making his eyes roll back into his scull way either. So I am watching some TV which to be honest I have been doing a lot of lately, and I get to this show there are these stupid chicks and one of them is a black female with BLONDE HAIR. WHAT THA FUCK. That has to be one of my all time "holy shit, what the hell is wrong with her" pet peeve type things. I am a black female and I don't think that many of us look good with blonde hair. This girl looks like a barbie experiment gone wrong. Not to mention that the three chicks in this show give all women a bad name. Some studio dumbass puts this shit out there and people actually watch it. Hell I just don't know.

Oh well now that that is over. Some times I just get a bit frustrated now back to the issue at hand. I am beginning to feel lonely. I love attention and when we were both on the same shift schedule I got all I wanted, unless C's computer tried to choke or something which has happened all of once in the last 5 months or so. so I am used to being the center of attention most of the time. Now I have no attention. I am hating it. Contemplating the internet chatrooms as a source of some attention and entertainment. But that would be wrong. I did that a few years ago and ended up with this guy who would follow me around on the net and try to tell me he loved me and that his cock missed me and shit like that. Some men are just a little too sheltered. I am also of the opinion that I do not need any borderline male activities going on right now. I don't want to have to ask myself is edating someone cheating. And I have a tendency to lie to people if I know that they will never know who I am.

It's SO bad I know but I like to see what I can get away with. Like a long time ago I used to use the phone chats. Well for those of you that don't have these where you live they are phone based chat thingies that you can go onto record a message and talk to people in your area. Well needless to say I was single at the time and the shit got really deep some days, and I got good at shoveling it. Well needless to say I had to give it up. started having trouble keeping the sudonyms straight and what guy thought I was whom. AND I cought myself contemplating the purchase of a book to write it all down in to keep things eaisy for me. Then I was like ok this is going a bit far. I need a hoby or just a good shaggin. Oh well this is getting a little long and it is time for me to get off for home.

Later people

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